One of the first questions you might hear if you’ve announced that you’re pregnant and you and your partner aren’t married is, “When are you going to tie the knot?” While getting married may be the last thing on your mind at the moment don’t be surprised if it’s the first thing on everyone else’s. So should you? Is it better for the baby if he or she has parent’s that are married by the time it’s born? While there is no definitive answer, and every couple is different, the most common answer to this question is no. Below are listed a few reasons while jumping to tie the knot because of pregnancy might not be the best way to go.
Rushing Into Things Isn’t the Best for Anyone
While it may seem ideal to bring a baby into the world with two loving, married, parents that may not be the case, especially if it means that you and your partner are going to be rushing into it. In many cases you two may still be working on getting to know each when you find out you have a bun in the oven. Jumping into a marriage for the wrong reasons (ergo, pregnancy) can be the fastest way to end a marriage early. Taking the time to get to know each other and make sure that you want to spend the rest of your lives together can be much more beneficial for all of you than just jumping into something that you’re unsure of.
Divorce is More Damaging than Not Being Married
Keep in mind that having to watch parents go through a divorce can be more damaging to children than watching their parents get married. Waiting to take those vows isn’t going to cause your child any added stress, in fact, depending on how long you decide to wait, your child may even be old enough to enjoy being a part of your special day. It’s much more important that you and your partner know that what you want for the rest of your lives is each other, than to jump into it and end up filing for divorce down the road.
Being Happy is Key: Together or Apart
Keep in mind that the best thing you can give your child is loving and happy parents. Staying in a relationship with someone you hate, or even just someone you don’t like, isn’t something that can be hidden. Children pick up on more than parents tend to realize, and this definitely includes tension between their parents. It’s better for a child to have two happy parents in different houses than miserable ones who live together.
Contrary to all the opinions you may hear from friends or family it’s important that you don’t rush into marriage strictly because you’re bringing a child into the world. Evaluate your relationship and make sure you really know each other before deciding to tie the knot. In the end that’s what will be best for all of you.