One of the greatest things you can do for your children after a divorce is learn how to successfully co-parent. Although this is rarely easy, it will provide your children with stability and an ability to have close relationships with both parents. Having to put aside your own feelings towards your ex for the benefit of your kids can be very stressful, but it is possible to do so. Here are a few reasons why co-parenting after a divorce is so important for the mental and emotional health of your children.
It Will Allow Them to Feel Secure
Everyone can agree that security is something that all children should feel in abundance. This security will allow them to feel confident about the love from both of their parents. In turn, the kids will be able to adjust much more easily to the after effects of your divorce and will even give them more self-esteem as a result. Making sure your child knows that they are more important than the conflict that ended your marriage is key. They need to know that it wasn’t about them and that both parents love them very much.
Children Benefit from Consistency
As most parents, married or divorced, can tell you, consistency is key when raising children. This is even more imperative when the parents have separated or divorced. Instead of both households having completely different rules or standards, which can easily confuse the younger ones, co-parenting allows children to have similar rules, expectations, and discipline regardless of which parent they’re spending time with. This helps children to know what is expected of them and what they can expect. This also keeps your children from trying test the limits with the parent they feel is more lenient.
Teach Them how to Problem Solve
Not only will co-parenting help your children’s mental and emotional state, but it can also teach them some beneficial skills that they’ll be able to use their whole lives. Children who are raised by parents who successfully co-parent learn to problem solve. Watching their parents work together amicably, even throughout something as messy as a divorce, will help the kids learn to solve problems in the same way. They’ll be less likely to react with anger when problems arise and instead learn how to effectively and peacefully solve problems themselves.
You’ll be Giving them a Healthy Example to Follow
Even though it may be difficult for you, by learning to work together with your ex you will be providing your children with a life pattern that they will be able to carry with them into the future. Not only does this benefit your child right now, but it can have a significant impact on their entire lives.
Co-parenting can be hard. Especially at the beginning. Learning to put aside your own anger, hurt and resentment may feel like one of the most difficult things you’ve ever had to do. However, this can be one of the most beneficial things you ever do for you kids.